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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Perks of reaching 50 or being over 60 and heading towards 70 or beyond!

1. Kidnappers are not very interested in you.

2. In a hostage situation, you are likely to be released first.

3. No one expects you to run -- ANYWHERE.

4. People call at 9 PM (or 9 AM) and ask, 'Did I wake you?'

5. People no longer view you as a hypochondriac.

6. There is nothing left to learn the hard way.

7. Things you buy now won't wear out.

8. You can eat supper at 4 PM.

9. You can live without sex but not your glasses.

10. You get into heated arguments about pension plans.

11. You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge.

12. You quit trying to hold your stomach in no matter who walks into the room.

13. You sing along with elevator music.

14. Your eyes won't get much worse.

15. Your investment in health insurance is finally beginning to pay off.

16. Your joints are more accurate meteorologists than the national weather service.

17. Your secrets are safe with your friends because they can't remember them either.

18. Your supply of brain cells is finally down to manageable size.

19. You can't remember who sent you this list.

20. And you can put all these in big print for your convenience.

AND THE MOST IMPORTANT THING:
Never, NEVER, NEVER ,
Under any circumstances,
Take a sleeping pill, and a laxative on
The same night! :huh:
 

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Sooooo very true. And that last little piece of advise made me laugh so hard I dang near passed out :crazysmile::crazysmile:
 

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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
I thought so too! :fat:
 

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So where did you get all that info about bob..... ?
 

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Well I did give you credit for not taking a sleeping pill and a laxative !!
 
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Would have been a crappy dream.
 

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That's what you call having shitay night !!
 
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Discussion Starter · #9 ·

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:lemo: .................
 

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" AND THE MOST IMPORTANT THING:
Never, NEVER, NEVER ,
Under any circumstances,
Take a sleeping pill, and a laxative on
The same night! "

You're obviously not old enough to really appreciate these theorems. BTW you might want to know (ymwtk) if you accidentally fell asleep on the stool as often happens, you wouldn't have this problem middle of the night problem. "Old age ain't for wussy's"
 
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" AND THE MOST IMPORTANT THING:
Never, NEVER, NEVER ,
Under any circumstances,
Take a sleeping pill, and a laxative on
The same night! "

You're obviously not old enough to really appreciate these theorems. BTW you might want to know (ymwtk) if you accidentally fell asleep on the stool as often happens, you wouldn't have this problem middle of the night problem. "Old age ain't for wussy's"
Now that's never happened to me ...........but I'll keep it in mind so that when I'm "old enough" .........like you bob, I'll just have to remember to bring my pillow into the bathroom with me !!
 

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From the looks of "it" you may not need a pillow. Just sayin.
 

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Discussion Starter · #14 ·
ouch!.....I feel sleep on the bathroom floor a couple times...does that count?:drunk:
 

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Only if you slid off the toilet............onto the floor.........like bob does !
 

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Naw. I'm stuck in that lid hole tight. It has to be an on purpose, get up, for me. That's why that speedo doesn't slide down guys. Form fit. As far s sleeping on the floor, no, but draped around to bowl....oh yeah. I hate hung up hang overs. It's why I sip.
 

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Discussion Starter · #17 ·
couldn't, I was huggin it fer dear life cuz the bathroom was spinning...:blink:
 

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BTDT/NM (been there done that/no more). I really hate hangovers. Could NEVER be an alkey.
 
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couldn't, I was huggin it fer dear life cuz the bathroom was spinning...:blink:
That's the worst..............been a long time for me !!
 

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Discussion Starter · #20 ·
yup!....prevents me from over indulging as well...:sad:
 
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